


Indoor Boys

by idkspookystuff



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Watcher Entertainment RPF
Genre: (lovingly), Alternate Universe, Friends to Lovers, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Roommates, Shane Madej Being an Asshole, Slow Burn, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 02:56:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29644725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idkspookystuff/pseuds/idkspookystuff
Summary: “Holy. Fucking. Shit.”“What?” Ryan asks, breathless.“Melissa Joan Hart just followed me on Twitter,” Shane answers. "You know-"“Sorry,” Ryan interrupts. “I just thought we were gonna have sex so.”-it's ryan's apartment that he's letting shane stay in for a bit while he looks for a place of his own. the only issue is that shane's hot and it's giving ryan a complex.
Relationships: Ryan Bergara/Shane Madej
Comments: 14
Kudos: 33
Collections: The Shyan Shipping Society Stories





	1. See What I'm Up To

**Author's Note:**

> after being encouraged by many people to write a roommate au, she's here. this is HEAVILY influenced by indoor boys [(link pls watch)](https://www.indoorboys.tv/), but will 100% make sense if you haven't watched indoor boys. but you should because it's really good and i want someone to yell about it with thank u.
> 
> thank you to everyone at [the shyan shipping society discord](https://discord.gg/HwgFn8rKbU) (come join us) for being the best, encouraging me to write, and for teaching me the word "huffed". also for giving me a 100 names that sound like "ryan" when i couldn't think of one. y'all are the entire reason words go from my brain to the keyboard.
> 
> OKAY SO LET ME EXPLAIN THE FIC LAYOUT NOW
> 
> so this is a series of vignettes about ryan and shane's live in the apartment. there is a plot running through them but it's more of a peek into their lives, if that makes sense.
> 
> okay i'm done. i hope you enjoy this, and if you do, please consider leaving a comment, because they make me happy. also you can bookmark if you want so you can come back. 
> 
> bye ilu!!
> 
> [-is](https://hailwatcher.tumblr.com)

See, the thing is, it’s  _ Ryan’s _ apartment.

He knows his mom pays rent on it, but the lease is in his name. It’s his apartment. Shane doesn’t pay rent, or help clean, or fix stuff when it’s broken. He’s funny, smart, has good taste in movies, knows how to make popcorn, and is Ryan’s best friend, so Ryan’s letting him crash while looking for a place to live. Most of the time, it’s a good gig. Some of the time, like now, Ryan doesn’t know why he even bothers putting up with Shane.

“Who’s Liam?” Shane asks when Ryan walks into the room.

He’s holding Ryan’s phone and scrolling through Grindr. Ryan reaches to snag the phone from him, but Shane turns at the last minute and hovers obnoxiously above Ryan. “34, LA, looks like a muscle bro. And his first message was ‘ _ hey, baby boy _ ’. Ugh.” He gets a mischievous smile on his face and starts typing.

“What are you doing?” Ryan asks quickly.

“Replying to Liam,” Shane mutters.

“Hey!” Ryan says. He manages to snag his phone from Shane’s hands, but the damage has already been done. Shane’s written out ‘ _ hey big daddy, wanna put it in my little hole? :P _ ’, effectively ruining all chances at conversation with Liam who, (though he wouldn’t give Shane the satisfaction of telling him), does look like a muscle bro. “You suck.”

“You wish,” Shane replies, to which Ryan hits him with a pillow. Shane rolls his eyes and puts the pillow behind his head to lean against. He grabs his own phone and starts scrolling through social media. “Oh god, look at this,” he turns his phone to Ryan, where TJ has posted a shirtless photo captioned ‘ _ good news coming soon! _ ’ 

Ryan frowns at it. “Why’s he shirtless?”

Shane shrugs. “Guess that’s how you reveal good news.” He goes back to scrolling through Instagram. Just when Ryan thinks it's over and he’s safe to go back to cleaning the kitchen, Shane says. “You know what, your problem is that you’re too accessible.” He points his phone at Ryan. “You need to get off Grindr.”

Ryan sighs. His being perpetually single is a hot point of contention between himself and Shane, especially since Shane’s a serial dater who has a new boyfriend each week. “Shane-”

“No, I’m serious,” Shane says. “And if you’re horny you can just-” he shrugs as he turns back to scrolling through his phone, “-see what I’m up to.”

Ryan looks at him for a second, considering. It’s not like he’s never considered it before. Shane’s hot, and sex is easy for him, and Ryan’s undoubately attracted to his boisterously bisexual best friend. “I want someone who actually wants me, not a pity fuck from my best friend,” he says instead. Shane shrugs again, doesn’t look up from his phone. “And besides, you’re not even serious.”

Shane rolls his eyes from behind his phone, like  _ Ryan’s _ the one with the crazy points. “Yes I am,” he answers. He looks up at Ryan and the two of them lock eyes for a minute before Shane goes back to scrolling through Instagram.

It takes a while for Ryan to come up with a reason why they shouldn’t. But then he remembers a 5 foot something twink with bleach blonde hair who was in his apartment last week. “What about Tyler?”

“What about him?” Shane asks. “We went on, like, one date.”

“He slept over,” Ryan argues. Shane hums in reply. “I made him huevos rancheros and talked to him about his mother while you slept!”

Shane scoffs. “That sounds like a you problem,” he responds. “I haven’t spoken to him since.”

Ryan pulls his knees to his chest and rests his head on his knee. “Okay but.” He gestures between them. “This would be awkward, right? Like. Us. That would be weird.”

Shane huffs out a laugh. “That’s on you,” he says again. “I’m pretty sure I could handle it.” He gives Ryan a challenging look from over the top of his phone that has Ryan wanting to jump his bones, if not for the sensible part of his brain.

When they break eye contact, therefore freeing Ryan from the magnetic nature of Shane’s gaze, his brain comes back online enough to ask. “Okay, but what if it’s bad?”

Shane rolls his eyes. “Then we’ll laugh about it, dude.”

Ryan picks at the cuff of his jeans. “And what if it’s like,” his eyes flicker up to meet Shane’s yet again. “Good?”

Shane shrugs. “I don’t see how that’s an issue,” he answers. 

They stare at each other for a second before Ryan stands up. “Hold on,” he says. He paces across the living room, Shane’s eyes tracking him with a bemused smile on his face. “Are you even attracted to me?”

Shane sighs. “I wouldn’t have suggested it if I wasn’t.” When Ryan doesn’t reply, Shane puts his phone face down on his chest and makes grabby hands. “Come on, Brian.”

“Brian? That’s-” Ryan walks out onto the balcony with his hands raised in mock surrender and Shane laughs.

“Ryan, come on,” he calls after Ryan. “I’m just being silly.”

Shane’s phone buzzes with a text.

**RYAN**   
What do you want to do to me?

Shane guffaws. “What do I want to do to you?” he asks way too loudly, considering Ryan’s neighbor, a 60 year old conservative woman, shares a balcony with him. When Ryan shushes him and gestures to the phone, Shane sighs. “Fine,” he replies.

Shane spends a considerable amount of time typing. When he finally presses send, it’s enough to make Ryan’s mouth water with anticipation. “Oh dear god,” he whispers.

“Is that a no?” Shane calls.

“No, it’s-” he walks back into the apartment, closing the door to the balcony behind him. He leans against the door, refusing to meet Shane’s eye. “It’s a maybe.”

Shane smirks. He spreads out on the couch, long limbs everywhere in a way that makes Ryan weak-kneed, and gives him a look that Ryan’s never seen in all of their years of friendship. “Then get over here.”

Ryan steps forward, drawn in by long limbs and big, veiny hands resting on Shane’s thighs. But then the common sense kicks to remind him that

  1. This is his best friend and
  2. Shane’s a bit of a notorious slut.



“Nope,” Ryan says, and he turns on his heels, unlocks the door to the balcony as quickly as he can, and is back outside in seconds. He sits on a chair and pointedly ignores Shane calling after him. Shane doesn’t stand up from the couch, as if he knows Ryan’ll come back. (He’s right, but Ryan won’t give him the satisfaction of knowing that). 

**RYAN** **  
** When’s the last time you got tested?

Shane rolls his eyes at the text. “Like, a week ago,” he yells onto the balcony. 

**RYAN** **  
** For everything?

“Yes,” Shane replies. He sighs and puts his phone down. “Ryan, stop, you’re being ridiculous. Just come over here, okay?” 

Ryan comes back into the room, where Shane’s still spread out on the couch. He looks so good, and Ryan can’t think of a single reason not. He ignores the banshee screaming at him from inside his head ‘ _ it’s Shane _ !’ and walks over slowly. Shane holds his hands out and Ryan sits on the couch, his knees nearly touching Shane’s. Shane sits up a bit, grabs Ryan’s jaw to tilt his head up and oh god, if that isn’t hot. Ryan closes his eyes, everything in his brain going yes, yes  _ yes _ . Shane leans in, in, until Ryan can feel Shane’s breath on his face and Shane’s hand tightens on Ryan’s jaw and then-

“Holy. Fucking. Shit.”

Ryan opens his eyes and finds Shane staring at his phone. Shane’s hand drops from Ryan’s jaw and he smiles at the notification. “What?” Ryan asks, breathless.

“Melissa Joan Hart just followed me on Twitter,” Shane answers.

“What?” Ryan asks again.

“Melissa Joan Hart?  _ Clarissa Explains It All _ ?” Shane answers. Ryan feels a little like he’s in The Twilight Zone, like he’s the crazy one for stopping in the middle of a heated moment to look at Twitter. “You know what’s crazy? I’ve always felt a connection with her. Like when I was wa-”

“Sorry,” Ryan interrupts. Shane looks up from his phone. “I just thought we were gonna have sex so.”

Shane rolls his eyes. “Ryan, it’s  _ Sabrina the Teenage Witch _ ,” he says. “We’ll hook up another time,” which would be an absurd statement if it came from anyone else’s mouth. As it is, Ryan’s still not entirely sure he hasn’t traveled to another dimension.

Ryan sits back on the couch and sighs. Now, without Shane staring him down like a wolf, it does seem a little improbable. He shouldn’t hook up with his best friend. Especially not when said best friend is Shane, who has never, and would never, settle down. He would much rather have Shane in his life as his best friend than have a one-night stand that kicks Shane from his life forever.

Ryan opens his phone and goes on Twitter to find that Melissa Joan Hart did, indeed, follow Shane. “Just got cock-blocked by a 90s sitcom star,” he tweets outloud for Shane’s benefit.

Shane huffs. “That’s funny,” he says. “I’ll retweet it.”

Ryan, despite himself, gives a private little smile to his phone. “Thanks.”


	2. Husband Material

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shane's hookup threatens Ryan and Shane's Sunday morning plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry these are really dialogue heavy i realize that's annoying that's just how my brain works.
> 
> i hope you like this one. it wasn't as plot heavy as the first one but it's some good old fashioned fun. i would say i'm gonna try to write faster but i'm in college so i shocked i even get my homework done tbh.
> 
> leave a comment letting me know what you think!
> 
> [-is](https://hailwatcher.tumblr.com)

The smell of eggs frying, coffee in the pot, the fresh air of the morning pouring in through the open door to Ryan’s balcony. There is nothing better, Ryan would argue, than a Sunday morning. It feels like a new beginning, like January 1st without the hangover, and it’s a day to veg out on the couch with Shane and talk shit about every single dress on _Say Yes to the Dress_.

It starts, like most Sunday mornings, with Shane fast asleep. The pot of coffee finishes, and Ryan carefully pours it into two mugs. He takes the mug and walks down the winding stairs to where Shane is sleeping: a Sunday morning tradition.

He’s expecting Shane to be asleep. He’s expecting Shane to be asleep shirtless, even. What he isn’t expecting is for Shane to be asleep, shirtless, and have some random blonde twink sleeping on top of him.

Ryan rushes back up the stairs, accidentally pouring some coffee on the floor as he does. This is fine. Shane is, after all, a notorious player. The fact that he brought home some random twink and didn’t kick him out is fine, the fact that they’re cuddling is fine, and the fact that this twink is now going to impede on their lazy Sunday tradition is _fine_.

Ryan’s still being perfectly fine and _not_ spiraling into a pan of eggs when Shane yells up the stairs, “Ryaaaaan. _Coffeeeee_!”

“Come on up!” Ryan replies. He pointedly does not look towards the stairs and instead stares into the pan, as if it could unlock the secret to finally understanding his roommate. 

Shane comes up the stairs with the blonde twink in tow. “Morning,” Shane mutters under his breath. His hair’s a mess, but at least he has a shirt now. He hisses when Ryan flicks on a light. He’s clearly had better days.

“Morning!” Ryan replies. He takes the pan off the burner and grabs plates. “How are we?”

“Ugh.” Shane grabs one of the mugs of coffee from the counter and makes his way towards the kitchen table to drop into a chair. “Stop yelling.”

“Hi,” the blonde twink says. Someone, despite presumably having the same night as Shane, he seems in a much better shape. “I’m Mateo.” 

Ryan gives him a forced smile. “Hi, Mateo,” he answers. Everything in him wants to spill his mug down Mateo’s beautifully sculpted chest, but instead he starts another pot of coffee because he’s a glutton for punishment.

Shane points towards Mateo, his forehead resting against the kitchen table. “Do you want a ride home?” he asks.

“I made breakfast,” Ryan interjects. He moves the eggs onto the plates and grabs another mug from the cabinet.

“He doesn’t want breakfast,” Shane mutters at the same time Mateo says, “I would love breakfast!”

Ryan smiles over at the two of them. “Well, I made vegetable omelettes and those will be up in just a second.” Shane looks up at him for just long enough to throw him a questioning look, to which Ryan shrugs. If Shane’s going to bring home a twink to interfere with their Sunday plans, the least Ryan can do is make the guy some breakfast. He mentally curses his abuela for making him like this.

Ryan brings over the plates and drops one in front of Shane. He puts the other one in front of Mateo and purposefully rubs his hands over Mateo’s shoulders. He can see how Shane might be into him. “How’d you sleep? Did you sleep well in _my_ apartment?” he asks.

“Your apartment?” Mateo asks as Ryan grabs his own plate and then returns.

Shane rolls his eyes. “It’s fine,” he says. He stabs at the eggs with his fork and adds, “Ryan loves having me here.”

“I do,” Ryan says. “It’s just that it’s usually just me and Shane, you know? Just me and him. Alone.”

“Oh,” Mateo says. He takes a slow sip of his coffee and then looks between them. Shane glares at Ryan, but they’ve been friends for so long that it almost means nothing. “Do you two ever-”

“No,” Shane answers. 

“Oh god, no,” Ryan adds. He looks down at his plate. “I am very busy, so,” a bald-faced lie for a 20 something unemployed trust fund baby.

“Oh,” Mateo says again. He smiles at Shane. “Well then, that’s really cool of you. Keeping him company like that.”

Ryan’s head snaps up in shock as Shane nods in Mateo’s direction. “Yeah I just-” Shane sighs, puts his hand over Mateo’s. “I don’t want him to be alone, you know?”

Mateo nods and leans forward. Shane leans in too, and they’re about to kiss when Ryan drops his plate against the table, startling them both. “Well, I was alone last night and I did just fine, so.”

Shane leans his forward against Mateo’s. “I hope we weren’t too loud,” he directs at Ryan, and Mateo giggles.

“Why?” Ryan asks. He grabs his coffee and sips it. “Were you guys up all night talking?”

Mateo doesn’t look away from Shane. “No, we were having sex.”

Ryan rolls his eyes from behind his mug. Shane really knows how to pick the intelligent ones, clearly. “That’s good,” he says. Mateo goes to his phone. “Communication is so important. I remember when Shane and I first met and it was just like, we were talking all the time, it was-”

“Hey,” Mateo says to Shane. He points his phone in Shane’s direction. “I’m watching your stories from last night and you are so good at filters.”

Social media based compliments are the way to Shane’s heart, so of course Shane preens. “No,” he intones, laced with fake modesty. “Only a little.” He leans in and again they’re about to kiss when Ryan starts talking.

“Hey Shane,” he says. Shane rolls his eyes. “Do you remember Tyler? I totally forgot to tell you but I ran into him yesterday at the grocery store. You remember Tyler, don’t you? He’s looking for you everywhere.”

Mateo eats a mouthful of eggs. Ryan really fucking hates how pretty his mouth is. “Who’s Tyler?” he asks Ryan.

“Oh,” Ryan replies. He takes a sip from his coffee and looks over the brim at Shane, who’s glaring back at Ryan like he wants to snap both of his legs.

Mateo turns to Shane and Shane slumps back in his chair. “He’s someone I was kind of dating.” 

“Kind of?” Ryan asks.

“Ryan I swear-”

“No, I get it,” Mateo interjects. Shane and Ryan turn to him in tandem. “You just couldn’t bring yourself to break his heart.” He grabs Shane’s hand. “I had no idea that you were so sweet.” Ryan’s jaw drops; he’s honestly a little impressed at how unflappable this man is. Mateo gets his hand under Shane’s chin and connects their lips in a kiss that’s a little too heated for 9:42 AM on a Sunday morning in Ryan’s kitchen. Shane’s hand comes up to Mateo’s jaw as he takes control, scooting closer.

“Yeah,” Ryan interjects, breaking them apart. “You should really call Tyler, is all I’m saying.”

Shane sighs. “Ryan, relax,” he replies, as if that’s ever been an option for Ryan. He points at Mateo’s empty plate. “Are you done?” he asks.

“Oh, yeah,” Mateo replies. When Shane gets up and grabs his and Mateo’s plates, Mateo fixes him with an impressed smile. “Are you doing the dishes right now?” He smiles over at Ryan. “Husband material, right here.”

Ryan, if pressed, could not even begin to describe how horribly untrue that statement is. “So I’ll just take my plate,” he mutters to no one in particular.

Mateo heads to the bathroom as Ryan makes his way over to join Shane at the sink. Shane has the water on already so Ryan grabs a sponge and starts aggressively scrubbing. “You can do better than gogo boys,” he says. “He probably couldn’t name a single one of your favorite movies.”

Shane drops his dish into the sink and leans against the counter to face Ryan. “You know we’d be terrible together, right?”

Ryan sighs. “I know,” he answers. He stops scrubbing and turns to face Shane. “I find you very difficult,” even as his heart pounds just at being within feet of his best friend.

Shane grabs the sponge from Ryan and starts scrubbing his own dish. His hands are so big and so sure that it’s kind of giving Ryan a complex. He can’t get the mental image of Shane kissing Mateo out of his head, imagining himself in that blonde twink’s shoes.

“What are you gonna do without me?” Shane asks. “I’m moving to my new apartment on the 1st.” 

“I know,” Ryan answers.

Shane turns off the water and fixes Ryan with a look. “Do you really want me to, though?” There’s a long silence as Ryan considers the answer. He doesn’t want to give Shane the satisfaction of saying no, but he’s never been a great liar.

Ryan sighs. He turns so his back is against the counter and he can face the wall instead of Shane. “Can we please get him out of here?” he asks quietly. “I wanna watch _Say Yes to the Dress_.”

Shane shrugs. “Fine,” he answers.

When Mateo comes out of the bathroom, Ryan stops him. “Hey,” he says. “Name one of Shane’s favorite movies.”

Mateo smiles, bemused. “ _Speed Racer_ ,” he says. He smiles at Shane from over Ryan’s shoulder but, to Ryan’s pleasure, Shane doesn’t reciprocate, instead looking down at his phone. “We were talking about it last night. It’s actually-”

“Oh shit,” Shane says. 

Both Ryan and Mateo turn to look at him. “What’s wrong?” Mateo asks.

Shane puts a hand to his forehead. “One of my aunts just had a stroke.”

Mateo does a double take as Ryan puts a hand to his own heart. “Oh no!” he pitches his voice up in faux disdain. “Which one?”

“Brenda!” Shane replies. 

“Again?!”

“Wait, this is a recurring thing?” Mateo asks. Ryan has never been more happy that Shane likes them stupid than he is in this very moment. 

Ryan grabs Mateo by the arm and starts leading him towards the door. “Mathias, thank you so much for coming over. It was a pleasure having you, truly.”

Mateo looks baffled as he follows Ryan, Mateo still wearing only a pair of basketball shorts. “It’s Mateo, actually.”

“I know, right?” Ryan asks.

“Ry, can you grab my coat?” Shane asks.

“But it’s summer?” Mateo protests. 

Ryan shoves him towards the door as Shane says, “I’ll call you!” Ryan pushes Mateo out the door and runs down to grab his clothes. He opens the door again and dumps the clothes on the floor before locking it again. He waves to Mateo just to be a little shit; maybe his abuela didn’t raise him _completely_ right.

“Are you actually gonna call him?” Ryan asks.

Shane laughs and sits down on the couch in the living room. “Fuck no,” he answers as he queues up _Say Yes to the Dress_ , thus restoring order to Ryan’s Sunday morning.

**Author's Note:**

> comment if you want no pressure love you drink water!
> 
> [-is](https://hailwatcher.tumblr.com)


End file.
